Why don't you go home and at least let me enjoy myself!

From The Encyclopedia of Jewish Humor by Henry D. Spalding.

Bertha and her husband were watching a very sad play—an old-fashioned melodrama about unrequited love in which one of the sweethearts commits suicide and the other is beset with tragedy after bitter tragedy. Before the first act was over every woman in the theatre was weeping.

But Bertha's husband was unmoved. "Ridiculous!" he snorted every few minutes. At one particular scene, as the heroine lay dying in her lover's arms, and Bertha sobbed aloud, he actually laughed.

Bertha turned to him. "Look," she cried furiously through her tears, "if you don't like the play why don't you go home and at least let me enjoy myself!"